Written By Cari Borden

We’ve all seen it.
The whispers. The spin. The sudden stories being crafted behind closed doors about the “difficult employee” or the “non-team player.” Translation? Someone dared to speak up and rattled the cage of control.

Toxic leaders thrive on narratives. They weave them like spiderwebs, thin but sticky enough to trap others into believing half-truths. But here’s the kicker: when the very person they’re targeting walks into the room, the buzzing stops. Silence. Eyes shift. That fake smile reappears. And suddenly, all the authority and bravado disappears like smoke in the wind.

It’s not leadership, it’s performance art.

Recognizing the Signs

If you’re wondering whether this is happening to you, watch for these red flags:

• The sudden rewrite of your character. Yesterday you were praised for being innovative; today you’re “disruptive.”
• Shifting alliances. Colleagues who were warm now keep their distance, because the narrative got to them first.
• The hush when you enter. Conversations mysteriously end the second you step into the room.

How to Stay Strong

Toxic spin isn’t easy to endure, but you don’t have to crumble under it:

1. Stand in your truth. Their story is loud, but the truth is consistent—and consistency always wins long game.
2. Document everything. Don’t rely on memory when receipts will do.
3. Build allies outside the spin cycle. Find the people who see your work and not the leader’s fear.
4. Don’t mirror their silence. Keep showing up. Keep speaking up. Silence is the oxygen their spin thrives on.

Final Thought

Toxic leaders may control the room for a moment, but they never win the room for long. Narratives can be spun, but reality always reveals itself. Your strength lies in not letting their fear rewrite your story.

Stay grounded. Stay strong. And if you ever feel like you’re stuck in the survival game, find me—I’ll help you strategize your next move.