Written by Cari Borden

Let’s talk about the quiet hiring epidemic no one wants to admit exists nepotism.
And before you roll your eyes, no, it’s not just your imagination. In a market where unemployment is up, job listings are down, and companies hold the cards, who you know can feel like the only qualification that matters.

Nepotism, at its core, is favoritism based on personal relationships rather than merit. It can be family, friends, or even a manager’s “favorite” from a past life. And in today’s environment, where employers are cautious, risk-averse, and focused on loyalty over innovation, it’s sneaking in through the back door with a new name: “trusted referral.”

Let’s be honest: referrals aren’t the problem. But when referrals start replacing fair consideration, that’s when the system breaks.
You see it in job postings that never actually make it to the public, roles that close “suspiciously fast,” or promotions that mysteriously skip the top performers. You feel it when your interview feedback is glowing, yet somehow the job goes to the CEO’s nephew or the manager’s old college roommate.

What Nepotism Looks Like in 2025

It’s rarely obvious. It’s wrapped in language like:

• “Culture fit” (translation: someone we already know)
• “We went in another direction” (translation: someone already had the inside track)
• “We’re looking for loyalty” (translation: family or friends of leadership)

The power dynamic has shifted. Employers know candidates are desperate for stability, and that gives unethical hiring practices fertile ground. Many organizations claim to prioritize diversity, inclusion, and equity… until it’s time to hire someone’s cousin.

How to Stay Grounded When the System Feels Rigged

Here’s the truth: you can’t control who gets the inside edge, but you can control how you navigate it.

1. Keep your receipts (and your dignity).
   Document your interviews, feedback, and wins. Not to call anyone out, but to remind yourself that your value is earned, not gifted.
2. Network ethically.
   The antidote to nepotism isn’t bitterness, it’s visibility. Build genuine connections. Engage with your industry. Let people see your work, not just your résumé.
3. Ask better questions.
   When you’re in interviews, flip the script. Ask about how they ensure fairness in hiring or advancement. Their reaction tells you everything you need to know.
4. Recognize when to walk away.
   If a company’s leadership pipeline looks like a family reunion, don’t convince yourself it’ll be different for you. Take your talent where it can breathe.
5. Redefine success.
   The goal isn’t just to “get in”, it’s to grow where you’re valued. Ethical employers still exist. Find them, spotlight them, and help shift the tide.

The Bigger Picture

This moment in hiring isn’t just about favoritism; it’s about fear. Companies are afraid to take risks and hiring someone they already know feels “safe.” But here’s the thing: innovation doesn’t come from comfort zones, it comes from diversity of thought, experience, and background.

Nepotism may win short-term loyalty, but ethical hiring wins long-term sustainability. And the people who stay true to their principles, even when the game feels unfair, are the ones who end up rewriting the rules.

So don’t let someone’s shortcut make you feel like you’re falling behind. You’re not. You’re just running a longer, more ethical race.
And when you cross the finish line, it’ll mean something.

Lead Boldly, Even When the Odds Don’t Play Fair

If you’ve ever felt invisible in a system that rewards connection over competence, you’re not alone.
That’s why I created Lead Boldly, a space for honest conversations about leadership, culture, and the human side of work.

💡 Dive deeper into topics like this on the blog, where I unpack the real stuff behind leadership trends, power dynamics, and purpose-driven growth.

And if you’re navigating a tough career moment or rethinking your next move, let’s work through it together.
👉 Find me on Fiverr for coaching, interview prep, and leadership mentoring that’s no-fluff, human-first, and tailored to you.
🔗 Visit my Fiverr page

Because the game might be rigged, but your story isn’t over.
Lead boldly anyway.